The Lord Of The Wings
by Wanda Wish
Summary: I think you can guess what this is about! Timmy wishes himself into a certain wellloved and extremely long book. What will happen? Read to find out! Chapter 2 up!
1. Prologue

**Disclaimer**- I don't own Fairly Odd Parents, or Lord of the Rings. Or a life, it would seem.

**Authors Note**- This is a little idea I came up with a few days ago when I was watching LOTR. I'm also re-reading LOTR, so I'm kind of in that zone. Plus FOP is always in my mind somewhere, so the natural conclusion was for the two to mix.

Am I mad to take this on? Definitely. How will I do this? No idea. Well, actually, I have a few ideas, or else I wouldn't be writing this at all.

The main reason is because The Expectants is driving me crazy. It's stuck in a major rut, and I hope working on a different project will help me get it out. So here it is; a Lord Of The Rings/ Fairly Odd Parents crossover. It won't be as emotional or full on as The Expectants, because that's just not how I want to do this. So sit back and enjoy this crazy ride.

_Once, there was a ring. It was a plain gold band at first glance, and seemed quite ordinary. But this ring was anything but ordinary. It possessed powers that were both fantastic and deadly. While there are many Rings of Power, forged for reasons both good and evil, this one stood above them all. It was forged by great evil, and nursed evil in its heart. With the reign of the Ring, dark times feel across the land, and hope was almost lost. Until finally, some stood against the ring, and it's creator. When both were parted, after a long and hard battle, the Ring was not destroyed. It was saved, as were the chances of the terror happening again. But the ring was not satisfied with staying with it's new master, so it left, through a series of convenient circumstances. But the luck of the Ring ran out, and it was lost in the bottom of a muddy river. The secrets of the Ring were forgotten by most, as it lay for thousands of years in its watery grave, and some things that should have been remembered, were not. _

_But then something worse happened than the ring being lost. It was found._

"Yawn," said Timmy Turner, throwing the book over his shoulder. "Too many words…not enough pictures…losing interest…"

"But Timmy," said one of his goldfish, poofing out of the fishbowl and picking up the book. "You've only read the dust cover. 'The Lord Of The Rings' is one of the greatest books ever written."

"You've got 'books' right," complained Timmy, pointing to a small stack of books resting on his bedside table next to the fishbowl. "When I finish that one, I still have two more to go! Was the author so unhappy with boring me once that he had to do it three times?"

"But Timmy," said Wanda, trying to reason with him. "'The Lord Of The Rings' is filled with action, adventure, good triumphing over evil, bravery, fighting…"

"And lots and lots of words!" added Cosmo, poofing out of the fishbowl to join the conversation.

"Face it Wanda, it's a book about jewellery," said Timmy. "If I wanted to read about that, I'd look at one of Mum's catalogues." He sighed and flopped on his bed. "If only there was a movie version I could watch…"

"Timmy, no one would be stupid or fool-hardy enough to make a movie adaptation of this book. Do you know how many millions of dollars that would need, not to mention the special effects, rewriting sections to suit the screen, casting, scouting a location, which would probably be in some far-flung country half the people who watch it would never have heard of…"

"Alright, alright, I get it, so there won't be a movie," said Timmy, cutting Wanda off. "I just wish there was some way I could understand these books better."

"Wanda! Wanda! He said it!" said Cosmo gleefully.

"I heard," said Wanda, twirling her wand. "One literature appreciation wish coming right up!" The two fairies twirled their wands, and in a large poof, the three disappeared from the room.

**Authors Note 2-** Naturally, some people will despise me for even attempting this. Especially because of the light-hearted way in which I will do it. So, if there are any die-hard Tolkein fanatics out there, bring it on! (Also, what are you doing in the Fairly Odd Parents section, reading my story? Hmmm?) This will be a massive undertaking (oh gosh, what am I thinking doing this!), so if anybody has any suggestions, I'm all ears. You will get due credit and praise, of course. Though, I do already have some ideas for characters, as I'm trying to bring in as many FOP characters as I humanly can. For example, Crocker, Juandissimo, Timmy's parents, and certain little grey-hatted characters are all definitely in.


	2. A Long Expected Chapter

Timmy opened his eyes. In front of him he could see rolling green fields, some with sheep grazing peacefully, some sown with healthy crops. He looked down, and saw his clothes were different. He was wearing an old-fashioned waistcoat over a white shirt, and strangely enough he wasn't wearing shoes. He looked past his feet and saw he was standing on a dirt road. His eyes followed the road and saw it led past houses built into the side of a hill, each with neat little gardens in front.

"Good, isn't it Timmy?" said Cosmo from behind him. Timmy yelped and spun around. His godparents were grinning at him, obviously pleased their wish granting had worked so well. Cosmo was wearing much the same type of clothes as Timmy was, and Wanda had on a medieval style dress.

"Where are we?" asked Timmy, continuing to look around.

"Inside the book," said Wanda. "Just like you wished for.

"I'm in The _Lord_ Of The _Rings_?" said Timmy incredulously.

"Well, near enough," said Wanda.

"You're in our version," explained Cosmo. "It's much like the original book, but far less vulnerable to copyright laws."

"Oh," said Timmy, some what in awe of his surroundings. Then he looked back to his godparents. "Shouldn't you two be hiding or something?"

"We don't need to here," explained Wanda. "Technically we aren't even fairies anymore."

"We don't even have wings!" said Cosmo, turning around and pointing at his back to prove it.

"But you still have your magic, right?"

"Well…" they both started to say, but were interrupted when Timmy's parents joined them.

"Mum? Dad? You're here too?"

"Not for long!" said Mum, sounding extremely happy. "We're retiring!"

"Retiring from what?" asked Timmy.

"Retiring from being your parents, silly!" answered Mrs Turner.

"You're old enough to be on your own now," explained Mr Turner.

"Wow, really!" said Timmy excitedly. "No babysitters, no child minders, nothing? Just me?"

"Sure, why not!" said Dad. "We've just got to give you your inheritance before we go."

"My inheritance?" repeated Timmy, his eyes beginning to shine.

"Sure! You inherit everything Timmy. If you didn't, it would all go to _Dinkleburg_."

"Why would it go to Dinkleburg?" asked Timmy.

"Because he's my second cousin once removed on my mothers side, obviously," said Dad. "But thankfully I have a son, and you get everything."

He pulled out a list from his pocket, putting on his glasses. "Let me see… you get the house, the pony, all our money that we haven't spent or plan to spend, plus all the furniture, including our surround-sound entertainment system."

"You're forgetting something honey," reminded Mrs Turner.

"Am I?" He gasped with horror. "You don't mean I have to give him my gold tea strainer!"

"No sweetie," sighed Mrs Turner. "I mean that ring thing you obsess over."

"Oh, right, my ring," muttered Mr Turner, reaching hesitantly into his pocket. "You get my ring as well."

"I didn't know you had a ring Dad," said Timmy. "Apart from your wedding ring."

"No, I have this one too. Surely you know about this ring?"

Timmy shook his head, looking blankly at his father.

"Oh. Well, there's no time to explain how I found it now. You'll just have to read about it in the book I wrote; How _I Went There, And How I Came Back Here Again_, also known as _The Idiot_. You should really read it some time Timmy. Well, if that's everything, we should probably be off."

"Uh, Dad, the ring," said Timmy, holding out his hand.

"Ah, yes, of course," muttered Dad. "But you probably don't want this ring. Maybe I should just keep it…"

"Just give Timmy the ring," snapped Mrs Turner. "Our horses leave in two minutes!"

"Of course honey," said Mr Turner, and dropped the ring into Timmy's open palm. "Bye son!"

"Bye Timmy!"

Timmy watched as his parents linked arms and trotted happily down the path, calling "Mountain resort, here we come!" When his parents had disappeared, Timmy turned slowly to his Fairy Godparents. "What are my parents doing here?"

"Well, you wished there was some way you could understand the books better…" began Cosmo.

"And what better way to make it relevant than to incorporate people you know into the story!" concluded Wanda.

"Well, how many are going to be in it?" asked Timmy. Cosmo and Wanda glanced at each other. "We don't actually know," admitted Cosmo. "We just waved our wands and left it to chance."

"Okay," said Timmy. "So I'm here in a strange land with my Fairy Godparents, and my real parents have just given me my own home and left me to my own devices." Timmy started to grin. "Guys, there's some fun to be had here."

"Well, what do you want to do first?" asked Wanda.

Timmy thought for a moment. "I don't know! There's so many things…so many…I don't know what to do first!"

"Well, why don't you start out small?" suggested Cosmo.

"Good idea! Now what have I always wanted to do that my parents haven't let me?" Timmy thought for a moment. "I always wanted to eat a bowl of icing… I wish I had a bowl of chocolate icing!"

"Uh," said Cosmo and Wanda, looking at each other.

"'Uh' what?" asked Timmy suspiciously. "Make with the icing already!"

"Timmy, we can't," explained Wanda. "We don't have our magic anymore."

"What!" exclaimed Timmy.

"Magic doesn't exist in here like it does in the real world," explained Cosmo. "We're basically powerless."

"You mean I can't wish for anything? I can't…I can't even wish myself out?"

"Sorry sport," said Wanda apologetically. "You're stuck here until the end."

Timmy sighed. "_Now_ you tell me."

"Cheer up Timmy," said Cosmo. "We can still have fun, even if we don't have our magic any more."

"Yeah, I guess," admitted Timmy. "I still want my icing though."

"Wanda can make it!" said Cosmo happily.

"What!" exclaimed Wanda. "No I can't! I don't know how to!"

"You'll learn, Wanda," said Cosmo with a gentle smile, putting a hand on her shoulder. "You'll learn."

A very happy week passed for the three friends. Wanda did learn how to make icing, and Timmy learnt never to eat so much of it again. Timmy had been left an awesome house from his parents; like all the rest, it was built into the side of the hill. They had been worrying about where their food would come from, until they found the well-stocked pantry's Timmy's parents had left behind. The cakes had been the first to go, along with fruit pies and candies. Timmy's teeth had hurt a lot, but that didn't really stop him. But being able to eat whatever he wanted wasn't the only benefit to living without his parents. He could stay up as late as he wanted, then play all day when he woke up. It was the best week of his life, and having his godparents around him all day without having to worry about anyone seeing them was great.

Right now they were all lying outside in the front garden under a gentle sun, listening to the birds chirp around them.

"Wanda, I'm hungry," complained Timmy.

"Well, I think there's some broccoli left," she said.

"I'm not that hungry."

"Wanda, I'm hungry too," whined Cosmo.

She sighed. "I'm not here just to feed you two, you know."

"Wanda, pleeease," begged Timmy. "I'm soooo hungry. I'm starving."

"Me too," added Cosmo. "I'm skin and bone over here!"

"Alright, alright, I'll go and see what I can find." She got up from the grass and went into the house.

"Thankyou Wanda," Timmy called. He sighed happily and smiled. "This is the best wish I ever made."

"Why?" asked Cosmo.

"Because I've had so much fun here, even though there isn't any TV or video games. It's perfect."

"Oh sure, it starts out nice," said Cosmo. "But it gets real scary later on."

"How do you know?" asked Timmy curiously.

"Wanda read me the book once," explained Cosmo with a shrug.

"What happens?" Timmy asked nervously.

"I can't tell you," said Cosmo. "One, because it's against 'Da Rules', and two, I don't remember."

Timmy was stopped prevented from asking any more questions by Wanda emerging from the house. "I've found some sausages. Will that do you?"

"Yes thanks," answered Timmy.

"Good." Wanda came and lay back down. "Now Cosmo can cook them."

"You're going to let Cosmo cook them?" Timmy asked.

"I can handle it Timmy," said Cosmo. "Wanda, what do I cook them on?"

"The stove, Cosmo," she sighed.

"Oh, right. Of course. That's the big wooden one, right?"

Wanda sighed again, this time with a touch of annoyance, and got up. "I'll do it." As she stood up she looked down the road, and saw a figure walking along it towards them. She frowned curiously but thought nothing more of it; they probably weren't coming to them anyway.

Cosmo and Timmy continued to lie on the grass after Wanda had gone, and looked for shapes in the clouds.

"That one looks like a rabbit," said Cosmo.

"Yeah, and that one looks like an elephant," said Timmy.

"There's a monkey!"

"That one is the Crimson Chins head!"

"And that one looks like Jorgens head!" said Cosmo happily.

"Which one?" asked Timmy. He looked over at Cosmo and yelped. "Cosmo, it is Jorgen!"

"Yes, it is I, Jorgen von Strangalf, strongest wizard in Middling Earth," growled Jorgen, looking up from where he had been leaning over Cosmo. "I have been searching for you, Timmy Turner. I have much to discuss with you."

"Like what?" asked Timmy.

"No! Not out here! There are spies of the Enemy everywhere!" Jorgen glared distrustfully at the bushes. "We must go inside." He yanked Timmy up from where he was sitting on the ground and planted him firmly on his feet. "In!" Timmy was marched indoors, with Cosmo trailing behind them.

He led Timmy into the sitting room, and sat. "We have much to discuss," said Strangalf.

"Yes, you've said," responded Timmy. "What do you want to discuss?"

Jorgen opened his mouth to reply, but Wanda entered the room at that moment.

"Who is this?" growled Jorgen, eyeing Wanda distrustfully.

"This is Wanda," said Timmy. "She's my friend, and _not_ a spy for the enemy."

"Who are you meant to be?" Wanda asked Jorgen. "And what are you doing here?"

"I am Jorgen von Strangalf, strongest wizard in all Middling Earth. I have much to discuss with Timmy."

"Well then I'm sticking around to hear it," said Wanda firmly, and sat down in one of the chairs. "Cosmo, go and turn the sausages."

"But…"

"Go!"

With much grumbling and complaining Cosmo left the room.

"Now what is it you wanted to discuss with Timmy?" Wanda asked, business-like. Jorgen opened his mouth and was about to answer when a screeching howl came from the direction of the kitchen. "Not with your hands, Cosmo," Wanda sighed to herself. She quickly left the sitting room and hurried to her husbands aid.

"I am glad she is gone," said Jorgen. "Now we can finally talk. I believe you have inherited something from your father, Timmy."

"Blue eyes? Short attention span?"

"No!" roared Jorgen. "A ring! You inherited a ring!"

"Oh yeah!" exclaimed Timmy, pulling said article from his pocket. "He gave me this."

Jorgen looked at the ring with a mixture of curiosity, fear, and awe. "The ring," he breathed. His sharp blue eyes focused on Timmy, making him flinch. "Do you know what this ring is?" Jorgen asked Timmy.

"A ring?" he guessed. Jorgen let out a harsh laugh,

"It is far more than a ring, Timmy Turner. It is _the_ Ring."

"_The_ Ring?" repeated Timmy, puzzled. "Well, what's so special about _the_ Ring."

"It is the Ring to rule over Middle Earth," explained Jorgen sombrely. "It was created by the Dark Lord Sawon, and has powers the other Great Rings have not. It was lost from Sawon, until it was found again."

"Well that makes sense," said Timmy.

"He seeks for it now, and he _must not be allowed to find it!_"

"Okay, but why are you telling me all of this?" asked Timmy.

"Because, Turner, the Ring must not stay in Shireton. It has to leave and journey to Riverdwell."

"No problem," said Timmy, stretching. "I'll take it."

"Brave, Turner," mocked Jorgen. "Or incredibly stupid. You don't know the dangers that await you."

"Oh please," scoffed Timmy. "It can't be _that_ dangerous. I'll be with Cosmo and Wanda; we take the Ring to this Riverdwell place; no problem."

"Riverdwell is a long journey from here," warned Strangalf. "The way will be…"

"Dangerous, yeah yeah," said Timmy, sounding bored. "What _is_ Riverdwell anyway?"

"It is a home of elves," explained Jorgen. "Elfrond is the head of the house, and he is wise, and old by your standards."

"How old?" asked Timmy.

"Thousands of years," answered Strangalf.

"Ah," said Timmy. "That is fairly old."

Jorgen stood up. "You should prepare for your journey, Timmy Turner."

Timmy sat up a little straighter. "What, now?"

"Yes, now! The enemy is drawing closer and to wait here any longer would be a mistake. It's not like I would expect you to wait years and years before I see you again, finally alert you to the danger, then let you sit here for months after!" Jorgen said with a laugh.

"Riiight," said Timmy. "So, I guess I'll tell Cosmo and Wanda we're going." Timmy sighed. "I finally get to have some fun and it all ends."

While Timmy was saying this Jorgen had crept over to the window. His sharp ears had heard something rustling the plants outside. With a swift movement Strangalf put his arm out of the window and pulled up a squealing, struggling figure that looked a little like…

"Tootie!" exclaimed Timmy, leaping up from his seat. "Don't tell me you're here too!"

Tootie immediately stopped struggling. "Hi Timmy!" she said breathlessly, grinning at him.

"Be quiet!" snapped Jorgen, shaking her a little. "What were you doing outside the window?"

"Not stalking Timmy!" she said quickly. "I was, uhm, picking flowers?" Tootie held up a few rather sorry looking dandelions and grinned hopefully.

"I do not believe you!" shouted Jorgen, pulling Tootie into the room. "You are a spy!"

"She's not a spy," sighed Timmy, embarrassed at the thought he was standing up for Tootie.

"Are you sure?" asked Strangalf, glaring at Tootie suspiciously.

"Yes, I…I know her."

"Very well," said Strangalf sternly. "But she still knows too much to be left here. So as punishment for eavesdropping, she will go with you."

"Go with me!" repeated Timmy with alarm as Tootie cheered with joy. "Who are you punishing, her or me?"

Tootie barely heard him as she rushed over to Timmy and hugged him tightly. "Timmy! My one true love! No we can finally spend some quality time together!"

"Tootie, let go!" said Timmy, trying to pry her strong grip from around his body.

"Tootie?" said Wanda from the doorway, having returned from the kitchen. "What's Tootie doing here?"

"Tootie's here?" said Cosmo, coming in behind her. "Wow, you must be happy about that Timmy!"

Timmy shot Cosmo a look before finally managing to wrench out of Tootie's grasp.

"Guys, there's something important I have to tell you," he said.

"What is it, Timmy?" asked Cosmo.

"Let's just say you might want to make those sausages to go."


	3. Four's a Crowd

"Are we ready yet?" asked Timmy in a whiney voice. The four of them (Cosmo, Wanda, Tootie and Timmy) had been preparing to leave on their quest all morning.

"No wait!" cried Tootie suddenly. "I have to go to the bathroom!"

"Ooh, me too!" said Cosmo.

"Have we got everything?" asked Wanda as the two sprinted for the house. "Cause we're not coming back if you've forgotten anything."

"No Wanda, we've got everything," said Timmy.

"Maybe we should check again…" suggested Wanda.

"Wanda, we've checked five times already!" interrupted Timmy impatiently. "We have everything!"

"Did you leave the lights on?" asked Wanda suddenly.

"Yep," answered Timmy. Since he was moving out, Timmy had to sell the house to the Dinkleburgs. Which also meant the Dinkleburgs would have to pay any electricity bills.

"Great," said Wanda. "All we have to do is wait for Tootie and Cosmo and we can be off."

"Awesome," said Timmy. "This standing around is driving me nuts. But I kind of wish Strangalf could be here."

"You mean you actually want a controlling and powerful version of Jorgen travelling all the way to Riverdwell with us?" asked Wanda incredulously.

"Well at least he can still do magic," pointed out Timmy. "No one would mess with us if Strangalf was with us."

"Maybe not," said Wanda. "But the fact is he isn't here. We'll just have to do the best we can by ourselves."

"Well how well is that going to be?" asked Timmy, and Wanda didn't answer.

---

Finally at about lunchtime the small group set off, heading east out of Shireton. There was a lot of complaining about sore feet, especially from the two fairies who weren't used to walking at all.

"Guys, when we get out of here, I promise I'll never take your magic for granted again," said Timmy to his godparents.

"Neither will we," replied Cosmo with an exhausted sigh. "I'd kill just to have my wings back. We've been walking all afternoon."

"I know," agreed Wanda. "Except for those two hours we stopped for afternoon tea."

"And that half an hour we stopped because I had a stone in my shoe."

"And that hour we stopped to look at that really pretty stream."

"So basically," interrupted Tootie," we've been walking for about an hour all together."

"Well it was a tough hour," said Timmy. "Good thing we had all those breaks in between, right?"

Tootie giggled, then suddenly stopped walking and motioned for the others to do the same.

"Hooray!" said Cosmo, sitting down. "Another break!"

"No, I can hear a horse!" said Tootie excitedly.

"Maybe it's a pony!" said Cosmo, and they both squealed with excitement.

"It's probably Strangalf coming after us after all," said Wanda.

"No…I don't…don't think so…" said Timmy to himself, looking back down the path. He couldn't see anything because of the sun shining in his eyes, but he knew something was heading towards them past that bend in the road.

"Timmy, are you okay?" asked Wanda, suddenly noticing his strange mood.

"Yes. I mean, no. Not until we get off the path. I really think we should hide."

"Timmy, why?" asked Tootie curiously.

"I don't know," he said. "I just don't want anyone to see us." His three companions shrugged and trudged into the woods surrounding the path, hiding behind some bushes. Timmy lingered on the road; he wanted to run and hide deep in the trees, but at the same time he felt a strange desire to stay exactly where he was. Just in time his cowardice and common sense kicked in and he managed to run into hiding with his friends. His departure of the road came none-to-soon, because just as he left a horse and rider appeared. The horse was black, and huge. Timmy didn't know a lot about horses, but he did know that this was a powerful beast. Its hoofs glinted maliciously, and its muscles rippled in the sunlight filtering through the trees. But the sense of fear Timmy had from the horse was nothing to what he got from its rider. The figure was dressed all in black, and Timmy was unable to tear his eyes away. The rider turned its head (or what Timmy guessed was its head) in their direction, apparently trying to sniff them out. Timmy got an unreasoned terror from it, and the only thought he had was to hide from it. He had an overwhelming desire to slip the ring on. His hand crept closer to it without even realising what he was doing. And what did it really matter if he put it on? It was just one tiny ring… Timmy frowned with annoyance when his hand was pulled away by Tootie grabbing it in fear as she watched the path. The black rider moved to the edge of the road and seemed to debate wether to venture further into the woods. Thankfully it seemed to think the better of it and turned back, quickly saddling and galloping away.

The four friends let out deep sighs of relief.

"That was scary," said Tootie. "I wonder what it was?"

"I don't want to know," squeaked Cosmo.

"Whatever it was, it was looking for something," said Wanda ominously, looking at Timmy. "Or someone. Or someone with something."

"Who cares," said Cosmo. "It's gone now. I hope we never see it again."

"Me too," agreed Timmy, speaking for the first time since the rider had left. "I wonder why it did go though."

"I was thinking of throwing something into the bushes over there to make it go away," said Cosmo, and the others sighed in exasperation.

"Cosmo, like an agent of extreme darkness and evil (if that's what it was) would fall for that," said Wanda.

"Come on everyone," said Timmy, interrupting. "Let's get away from here. And let's stay off the path, in case there are more of those things around here. I'd rather face Francis than that."

---

They continued walking to the side of the path in the cover of trees. They were all unsettled by the rider they had seen, and screamed hysterically more than once when a rabbit would run in front of them. When dusk was starting to fall they froze with terror as they heard the sound of hoofs ahead of them.

"Riders!" squeaked Cosmo, and they all stopped dead. They were even too frightened to hide properly, and had only the darkness of the trees to conceal them. Their eyes were glued to the road, and instead of seeing a deep darkness, they saw a gentle glowing light.

"Timmy!" gasped Tootie happily. "They're elves!"

Timmy immediately relaxed and heard Cosmo and Wanda making scoffing noises behind him.

"Stupid elves," said Cosmo. "Making us worry like that."

"Come on!" said Tootie excitedly, ignoring Cosmo. "Let's go meet them!" She ran out of the trees with Timmy hurrying after her, Cosmo and Wanda trailing grudgingly behind.

Timmy and Tootie came out of the forest and watched the elves go past. Timmy looked on in wonder; he'd never seen such beautiful creatures before in his life. He was used to magic, but these creatures seemed to have something different to the stuff Cosmo and Wanda used every day. He watched as though in a dream as the elves passed, and barely realised they had gone before the last one walked by.

"Hello, small children," said the last elf with a smile, stopping in front of them.

"Hello," said Timmy, giving a small wave. "Uhm, I guess you're wondering why we're out at night so far from home."

"No, not really," replied the elf. "Such concerns are below me. Plus it's not really night and your homes are just down the road. It'd take you about an hour and a half to walk back."

Timmy laughed uncomfortably. "Yeah… Well you see, you aren't the first people we've met. There was a creepy guy on a horse we saw a little while back, about 200 feet that way, and he was wearing all black…"

"Black, you say?" said the elf. "Riding, you say? Hmm, this bodes ill."

"It what?" asked Timmy, but the elf paid him no regard.

"If the Black Riding Hoods are about again then you may be in some danger. Come, children, tonight you shall journey with us. And those friends of yours in the bushes too."

Cosmo and Wanda came out of some bushes behind them, grumbling and looking unhappy about the prospect of spending the night with elves.

"Hurry, we shall take you some where safe where you can eat and rest for the night. You'd best walk in the middle of our group; you may become weary before we halt for the night."

"Does this mean we're walking again?" complained Cosmo.

"You are young; if you were thousands of years old like we elves, walking would seem less wearisome."

"Don't believe it," said Cosmo sulkily, but he let himself be led to the centre of the elves.

---

After walking for a long time (longer than they had all day, at any rate) the elves finally halted. The four friends were led into a grassy clearing off a larger clearing where the trees reached overhead to form a sort of roof.

"Welcome to the green hall," announced the elf that had found them. "This is where I, Lord Goldir, will treat you to a meal; the best we can provide. Now I have introduced myself, perhaps you would care to tell me your good names?"

"Sure," said Timmy. "I'm Timmy Turner, those are my fair…uhm, my fair god parents Cosmo and Wanda, and that over there is Tootie."

"Very good, and a pleasure to meet all of you, I am sure," said Goldir. "But certainly enough time for talking will come after you have eaten. Please make yourselves feel at home; our hall is open to you, and our food is ready for hungry travellers such as yourselves."

The four starving friends grabbed the gilded plates they were given and didn't turn down anything they were offered. When their plates were piled with food, they found places to sit. Cosmo and Wanda chose a corner and were looking rather bitter about the grace and elegance the elves had.

"How come we aren't like that," muttered Wanda.

"I know," said Cosmo. "Last time I checked, all elves did were make toys for Santa." They sat in silence watching the lady and men elves smile and laugh and dance.

"They are really pretty though," said Cosmo.

"Yeah, they are," agreed Wanda. "And their food is really good." They both sighed dreamily, and watched the elves for a little while.

"You know what Wanda? Maybe elves aren't so bad after all."

"I think I agree with you on that one, Cosmo."

Timmy had chosen to sit near Goldir, and of course Tootie had to sit near Timmy. Even though Timmy didn't have the attention span to listen to some of the answers Goldir gave, he listened attentively to some of the bloodier tales he was told.

Eventually, when the pile of food on Timmy's plate was greatly diminished and the music the elves were playing had become softer, Goldir turned to Timmy with a serious look in his eye.

"I have said much to you, young Timmy Turner, but you have told me little. Perhaps it is due to my habit of talking in long sentences and valuing my opinions above your inferior ones, but perhaps it is because you have something you wish to keep hidden?"

"What? Well…but…I…" he quickly looked around to see if his friends could be any help, but Cosmo and Wanda were asleep. Even Tootie was snoozing were she had sat to eat her dinner.

"Fear not, young Turner. Your secrets will not reach the enemy from me."

"Then you know something," said Timmy. "Or you're a really good guesser."

"It is true, I do possess some excellent guessing skills," said Goldir with a smile. "But in this case, I know the enemy pursues you. I…"

"So Strangalf told you about the Ring?" interrupted Timmy. "You know that I'm heading to Riverdwell?"

"Actually, no," said Goldir. "I was just about to say I do not know _why_ the enemy pursues you."

"Oh," said Timmy. "Whoops."

"You are lucky Timmy Turner. I am an elf, therefore trustworthy. But I would suggest you do not repeat that to anyone else. But let us speak no more of it. Surely you must have questions?"

"Well actually, now you mention it, I…"

"The Black Riding Hoods must be first on your mind," said Goldir. "And I must interrupt you. I will say nothing about them, other than they are scary, and are to be avoided at all costs."

"Actually I wanted to know about that delicious dinner. What was in…"

"Your mind strays to your journey ahead, of course," said Goldir. "Naturally you wish to know what is ahead of you. You must move quickly, Timmy Turner, towards your next goal."

"Well, I _really_ wanted to know… No, I can't remember. So what's my next goal?"

"It is the Old Forest. It is what you are going through next."

"Will it take us long to get there?" asked Timmy

"Less time than you'd think," said Goldir with a twinkle in his eyes. But then he looked to Cosmo, Wanda and Tootie curled up sleeping and sighed. "Then again…"


End file.
